Last week a friend turned me on to an interesting idea.
What if you were about to give a speech for the entire population of this planet. Then suddenly some guy pointed a gun at your head and told you “Give the speech and I’ll let you finish, but I’ll shoot you in the head right after. Don’t give the speech and I’ll let you live. ”
Would you do it? Would you take the chance? And if you did, what would you say?
I thought about it for a while. I knew I would definitely do it and try to make some kind of impact to the best of my ability at that moment. But I had a hard time coming up with what exactly I’d want to say.
I mean, being able to speak to the entire world at the same time?
There’s so many things I’d want to tell everyone, or more importantly ask them, since it would be foolish to waste such an opportunity having a one-way conversation when so many people in the audience have wiser things to say than me. Then again, such a conversation would probably take me a few weeks.
I’m pretty sure the guy wouldn’t allow me to do that. He’d see it as a sneaky maneuver from me to try live a little longer. (Who knows, maybe he’d be right? I can be pretty sneaky sometimes. So sneaky that I manage to fool myself into thinking I’m not.)
So what I’d really need to do then, is to just give 15 minute speech that is so powerful & perfect it can finally liberate everyone on this planet from the imaginary cages they refuse to leave.
Unfortunately, I’m no Martin Luther King, Jr. I’m just some twenty-something ginger who refuses to buy into the trend of blind mediocrity that currently rules the world. And let’s be honest here. The only reason I’d even attempt to make it such “majestic perfect speech of epic proportions” would be to gratify my ego once more before it dies. And it would fail miserably, because that intent alone would make it less honest.
In the end I realized the best thing to do in such a situation would be to just cram as many one-sentence suggestions for the people, the (religious) leaders and the entire world in that limited time frame as possible. A snap shot of the vision in the mind of a guy/man/(guyman?) as it was, right before he left. Hoping other people would pick-up the pieces and improve upon on those thoughts after that.
I’ll probably forget to say some of the most important things that will have my soul facepalming itself all the way through the tunnel towards the bright light, but cut me some slack here, will you?
Like you wouldn’t forget what you wanted to say most when there’s some bully standing on the side of the stage pointing his gun at you? :p
- To Every Individual (Most Importantly: You)
- Take the red pill. It’s worth it.
- Breathe. Deep. All the time.
- Still not deep enough yet. (That’s what she said.) (But not to me. Just to be clear.) (Okay maybe it was about me. I don’t know, could be. I wasn’t there when she actually said it.)
- You were not put on this planet to live up to anyone’s expectations.
- You don’t need anyone’s approval to be yourself.
- Even though you’ve been raised to believe you do, you don’t ever need a reason or a cause for laughter. You can laugh as much as you want.
- People might judge you when you’re laughing for no reason. That’s okay. You can always choose to care and switch places with their uptight butts. Or you can just keep laughing. I recommend the second.
- In fact, if you’re not laughing right now, you’re part of the joke.
- You are born with an unlimited supply of 2 things: unconditional love and complete freedom. Don’t throw them away or refuse to use them just because everyone else is doing it.
- Love is not something that you can “get” from someone or that they can “take away from you”. It is something already inside you that you can choose to express whenever you want, for whatever or whomever you want and watch it multiply.
- You can never have a shortage of love, but you can choose to let it rot away and gather dust in some dark corner. Which I propose you don’t, or you’ll end up thinking other people are always hurting you when they really aren’t.
- No one has the power to make you feel bad except for yourself.
- Stop caring so much about your image. It ruins your image.
- Just because everyone’s doing it, doesn’t mean it’s right. More often than not the opposite is true.
- There is no value in upholding a tradition. Slavery used to be a tradition. Oppressing women is still a long-standing tradition.
- Straying from the path usually brings you to the most beautiful parts of the forest.
- Never obey anyone’s command unless it also comes from within yourself.
- If you can’t remember why you’re doing something, want to do something or ever started doing something, the idea probably didn’t come from you.
- If you don’t know your purpose in life, you’re currently serving someone else’s purpose. Which may or may not be something you like.
- If you don’t know your purpose in life, make finding it your #1 purpose.
- Never, ever, settle for less. “Something” is never better than nothing. At least “nothing” still leaves room for what you truly want.
- “Someday” is a synonym for never.
- Never bet on security. The whole idea of security is just an illusion.
- You have enough time in your life to do whatever it is you want. Anything else is a lie you invented because you’re afraid of what will come from doing it.
- Understand the value in constructive criticism.
- Understand there’s no value in any sentence that contains the word “can’t”. Except for the one I just wrote 😉
- Infinite patience produces immediate results. (Don’t dismiss this sentence as soon as you heard it, I stole it from a book my buddy read on a road trip. We didn’t understand it and it didn’t sound very believable, but we stayed open to the idea. Then we went “a-ha” for about a million times over the next few days.)
- Now that we’re at it. Open your mind as wide as a veteran porn star’s vageegee, and preferably beyond that. The smarter or more open-minded you consider yourself, the more you can be sure it’s not open enough yet. Take it from a guy who used to consider himself smart and open-minded. (Side note: Now I would be glaring at the guy pointing his gun at me and laughing when I think how “open” my mind will finally be after he shoots. Then I would absolutely not know what to think about coming up with such a weird joke.)
- Ignorance is never bliss. Ignorance is a fertile ground for throwing tantrums like a 5-year-old whenever you run into something you don’t like and don’t understand. Read books. Talk to people you think you won’t like. Do whatever you can to expand your vision.
- Learn to think outside the box. Then learn to think outside the box that was around you and the box. Then learn to realize that there never was a box in the first place.
- Life is too short to surround yourself with people you don’t like the full 100%. If you ever have to tell people your friend is actually “a really nice guy once you get to know him”, he’s probably not a really nice guy. You just have poor standards.
- Be loyal to quality, not to history. Live as you would live when you had the chance to fill in every detail of your life from scratch.
- Being radically honest makes everything in life easier. Want something? Ask for it. Don’t like something? Say it (to the person doing it, not everyone else). Feel something? Act on it. (The only hard thing about it is doing it consistently when we’ve all been raised to do the opposite. I’m massively guilty of chickening out on this as well. But at least I'm honest about it 😉 )
- Wear your flaws openly and don’t trust anyone who only does the opposite.
- Go wherever you feel most resistance to.
- Never complain. Whatever you focus your mind on you will find more of. That’s not spiritual woo-woo talk. It’s how your brain works.
- Worrying is the least effective way to spend your time. Can you fix it? Then stop worrying and fix it. Is it not fixable at this moment? Then worrying won’t fix it.
- You don’t owe anybody anything. Not even an explanation.
- Nobody owes you anything. Not even an explanation.
- You’re only here on this planet, in this form, for a relatively short time. Experience As much as possible. And I mean the real thing. Eat real food. Have real sex, instead of watching porn inside while you could be meeting the person to have said sex with. Spend time with real people doing real exciting stuff, instead of watching actors portraying real people doing stuff that’s interesting to watch. Or worse, watching real people who do the same boring stuff as you while you judge them on their character quirks.
- Let technology become your servant instead of becoming a servant to technology.
- Stop being in such a hurry. Maybe stand still for a while and figure out what you were running from.
- Stop trying to control everything. Surrender (Preferably to me.) You may find that ironically, it will finally give you everything you’ve ever tried to achieve by trying to control things.
- The road to disappointment is paved with specific expectations.
- Life is a celebration of itself. Every day is a celebration of itself as well. Don’t forget that.
- Oh, and never forget: It’s always your turn.
2. To Improve the Way We Treat Each Other
- Don’t be a dick.
- Also: don’t be a dick while in your car.
- If you think the other driver is a being a dick, you’re being a dick.
- Listen more. Talk less.
- Look everyone you meet straight in the eyes.
- Realize that everyone you’ll ever meet is a person just like you. Another person, who also experiences the same feelings, struggles and insecurities as you sometimes do. Another person trying to make the most of their life just like all of us. Another person who is not that different from you on the inside, trying to do what they believe is good, based on their own limited experience and worldview, just like you and I.
- That includes the lady behind the counter who seems to loathe her job, the guy in the BMW that flipped you off yesterday, people with a different skill color than you , homosexuals, hookers, convicted criminals, religious fanatics, people with a different gender than you (including any genders you don’t consider real), the guy on TV that looks stupid, the children on TV that are dying, people who like another sports team, the annoying telemarketer who won’t stop calling you, refugees , those young people with no manners and their loud disturbing music, etc. It also may or may not include Donald Trump. I’m not sure yet.
- Really feel what it’s like to be with each and every one of those people.
- Hug more.
- Touch more.
- Fuck more. Don’t act like you’re “a decent person” who’s not extremely into it. It’s basically why we’re here.
- Vulnerability doesn’t make you weak, it makes you strong.
- You can’t possess a person (though it can be kind of kinky and fun now and then).
- While we’re at it. You can’t really possess anything. Unless you let it possess you.
- Never base your opinion of anyone on hearsay or gossip.
- There is never an excuse for doing anything unto others you would not do to yourself. Note that if you are a serious masochist, you might want to check with the other person first.
- The ends never justify the means. Even if other people treat you really bad, that doesn’t justify retaliation. Be the first to break the cycle nobody wants to be in. That doesn't make the other side win. It prevents everybody from losing even more.
- The most arrogant thing to believe, is that your country, culture or belief system is the best just because you happen to be in it. Come on, what are the odds?
- Instead of rooting for your favorite football team and getting into arguments with people who choose to support the winning team (that clearly wasn’t yours) : How about all supporting sports in general and celebrating success?
- Stop criticizing each other. Applaud any attempt at moving up from sucking to mastering.
- There is no “stronger sex”. There are only 2 complimentary sexes. However: If we as men are so afraid of losing anything when we give women as little as equality in this society, I think that’s a pretty clear sign that deep down we believe we are the weak sex. Think about it, if we were really all such a bunch of tough guys, then it would be no problem giving someone weaker than us equal chances, right? We’d end up on top anyway. Just something to think about, bro. By the way. Sometimes it may be fun to let them on top from time to time. Or maybe it’s not even the point who’s on top 😉
- It’s not all about you: People don’t have to work/drive faster, be more polite or let you skip ahead of the line just because you are running late and believe you have something important to do. It doesn’t matter if you’re the Best man at your buddy’s signing of his love contract (because we all know without a contract, there is no true love), the CEO of Monsanto or the Crown Prince of Douchebagistan. Everyone matters just as much.
- Now that I think about, you’re no better than an animal either. All animals (including us) need to be happy is shelter, some food in their stomach, some stars to look at, flowers to smell and some birds to sing and some other animals to share the experience with. If you happen to be one of those crazy humans who believe they need status, security or a Ferrari to be happy, it would actually make you worse than animals, because animals found a more efficient way to become happy. And isn’t that what you want too?
- Stop competing with the rest of the population. There is no winning this race. Except if you get out of it and choose to collaborate and contribute instead of kicking others down in a useless attempt to get ahead.
- Realize that whenever you’re judging someone, you’re actually judging a part of yourself. That’s not necessarily bad, as long as you realize it and take action to let it go. Anything other than that will result in unhappiness and a weakened connection with the rest of the world. That is why holding grudges and anger weigh you down while true forgiveness feels good even though you’d never expect it.
3. For the Sake of Our Entire World (and Everyone On It)
- Just like our cells work together to form the complex ecosystem of our body, we are part of another complex body that is this planet, which is in turn part of larger body called the solar system, that is once again part of another body, and so on, and so on… Everything in this universe is connected.
- Right now, the better part of humanity is playing the role of a big sickness on this body called earth. We are cells that multiply rapidly, destroy every place of the body we choose to settle and actually don’t do a lot to contribute to the body itself. What does that resemble? Yes, cancer.
- Unfortunately for cancer, it acts very stupid. It doesn’t realize that if it keeps aggressively expanding like that without giving anything back to its host, it will eventually destroy the very body it needs to survive. So when that body dies, the cancer dies too. If only it had known…
- Luckily, us humans know. We’ve known for years. We now all have the choice to no longer act as cancer cells and start behaving like actual healthy cells that help the entire body sustain so that WE can survive longer as well. Yes, this is a choice every individual cell can make, you don’t have to wait for “big cancer leaders” to take action.
- Looking at the very mistake cancer cells are making throughout their lives, I think it’s clear to everyone that even if your sole focus in life is total egomaniacal personal gain at the expense of everything around you (in which case you must be a very nice guy), it would STILL be a smarter to choice to help sustain your environment instead of destroying it so you too can live longer.
- Now think about anybody you know that has/had cancer, how much you saw them suffer.
- Yup, that is exactly what you are doing if you’re not altering your behavior to be more environmental-friendly. How does it feel to know?
- You can laugh at people who try to reduce their environmental footprints, and call them weird, weak pussies and tree-huggers all you want, but if you don’t even have the strength of will to stop eating industrial meat when the future of our species and the planet depends on it, you’re behaving exactly like the cells that killed your friend or family member while they would’ve actually helped save them.
- Now if you eat fast food, here’s another thing to think about: You are now no longer destroying your environment in exchange for personal gain, but for personal loss. You are actually weakening yourself while destroying your environment. And you know you’re doing it. Not even cancer is that stupid. Just something to think about 😉
- The only thing you’re a 100% sure you can change in this person is yourself. So if you want anything to change in anyone on this planet, you know where to start.
- My unapologies for being so harsh on you all in this part. I just thought some tough love might’ve helped gotten a point across when the friendly informative messages from the last 50 years didn’t get through 😉 Don’t worry though, these final 2 minutes will only be direct at other people so they can make this world a better place for you (I hope). Neat, right? 🙂
4. To Our Political Leaders
- Don’t be a bunch of dicks.
- No one should ever be put in a position of authority unless they…
- Have a very healthy self-esteem
- Are aware of their own ego
- Realize their job is about the people, not about them
- Realize they don’t need to reinforce said authority
- Realize that disobedience or criticism are no personal attacks on them and do nothing to lessen their power unless they react defensively.
- This includes all teachers, cops and leaders.
- As leaders, your job is to Not to dominate. That’s an entirely different line of work.
- You do not stand “above” the people. You stand in the middle.
- Don’t make decisions yourself just because you feel “important”. Ask for guidance from the few on this planet that actually know the most about the specific issues you’re dealing with. Just a gentle reminder: those are generally not the same as the people who offer you most money to act in their favor.
- Your job is to protect people and regulate business, not protect corporations and regulate people. If you do the opposite of what you’re expected to do, you’re fired.
- Fired by whom? By the people of course. They employed you. That means they are your (See what I did there?)
- You are not leading a country. You are merely leading a group of people who chose to look at you for guidance. Countries only exist in the matrix, not in the real world. So it is by no means necessary to defend the collective ego of that country or try to be “better” than other countries. Don’t worry, they can’t be better than you either because they too, don’t exist.
- That means borders also don’t exist and all people are free to roam this planet that is owned by nobody. (What a weird idea, isn’t it common sense that parts of planets can be owned by people without the consent of the planet itself? 😉 )
- Lead by example, not by force. Don’t tell people to do things you’re not willing to do yourself.
- If you need to enforce your laws or vision through violence, that means they are probably worthless.
- Rules are not meant to be absolute. If applying the law lets criminals run free and innocent people go to jail, then fuck the law. Always remember why it was created in the first place.
- People that challenge the status quo should be stimulated instead of silenced. Every important advancement throughout history was made by people like that. Please remember that and watch out for the kind of culture you instill in our educational system.
- Be transparent and educate people about the real reason for your decision, without a single white lie. Not only do the counterproductive effects of lies multiply when applied on a large scale, the people know they are being lied to and manipulated by each and every one of you right now. They may not know exactly how, but they know. If they knew your decisions were in line with what’s best for everyone (they probably aren’t), I’m sure they’d follow without you having to control them and you’d receive massive respect from everyone.
- I repeat: The ends NEVER justify the means. Defense does not justify an attack, and blame does not justify a killing.
- Break the cycle by stepping out of the contests for “Who’s least sympathetic bully on the planet?”and “Which leader needs to overcompensate most for his incredibly small penis?” You don’t want to win those awards any way. And there are tons of herbal supplements or technological enhancements for that. Just check your spam folder.
- Take all the money, resources and human lives you waste on warfare, strategy and weapons and spend them on improving lives all over the planet, anticipating needs for the future and achieving a symbiotic and sustainable relationship with our environment.
- Do it.
- Do it.
- Every single one of you who doesn’t do it is being a massive dick.
- I’m aware some people like massive dicks.
- If you don’t do it, you’re the exception those people don’t like.
- Do it.
5. To Our Religious Leaders and Their followers
- Don’t be a bunch of dicks.
- Seriously, don’t.
- The goal of whatever prophet or messiah whose message you choose to carry out, was to raise spiritual awareness. The only chance you’ll ever have at succeeding in that, is when you stop fighting over who was right, realize they were all trying to convey the same message and join forces with each other to spread that positive message.
- If you truly love your neighbor, you don’t condemn them or try to impose your values on them. If you lack acceptance or even tolerance of who they are right now, you are in fact, refusing to accept an important part of yourself. Who else are you trying to convince?
- It is impossible to enlighten someone by telling them what they can or can’t do. In fact, that only accomplishes the opposite and turns them into blind followers.
- A temple built with the intention of making it a sacred place has the potential to let people who visit it undergo an important spiritual transformation. Fill that same temple with a hypocrite of a preacher and 300 ignorant followers and you’ll turn it into the exact opposite of that.
- Stop taking everything too literal. A symbolic spiritual message doesn’t concern the material world. If it did, it would be called a “practical message”. When personifying these stories or concepts, you make them lose most of their value.
- There is no God personified (except for you and everyone else). There are no people in the sky (except for me and some friends when we go skydiving in one or two weeks)
- The whole concept of God in reality, means nothing more than life/nature/the universe/consciousness itself.
- That means God did in fact create everything in her/his own image, and creation and evolution are actually one and the same thing. Let that one sink in for a moment. Now you can all stop arguing for good.
- Sexual energy is an important aspect of being human that should not be repressed or denied.
- Stop forbidding the enjoyment of life on earth. If our souls just experience this plane for a brief time, it’s pretty obvious we’re meant to experience as much of it as possible. Otherwise, how can we learn?
- It is extremely hard (that’s what she said) to fuck 72 virgins after you’ve just blown yourself into 239 pieces. I’m sorry, and I say this as a friend… But man. You are really dumb. It would’ve been much more efficient to just get yourself some hookers (the kind that deliberately chose their profession, not the kind you sell to other dumb killers and somehow manage to justify for yourself). The sex would be better, you’d still be in one piece, and you’d save a lot of innocent people a lot of suffering. No need to thank me for the advice. Anyone with a brain could’ve told you the same.
- Karma is real, but people misunderstand it when they try to interpret the idea on a “real-world level”. Or worse, when they think that they can act as a righteous agent to “collect Karmic debt” as in the idea of “an eye for an eye”.
- You won’t die for your sins in hell. It’s not even wrong to “sin”. “Good” and “bad” are just labels we attach to neutral things that exist. The reason they are called “sins” is simply because they hold a very low vibration on an emotional level, causing you to feel low as well. So the idea of “hell” is simply the experience you create for yourself, just like virtuous living will let you experience the reality of“heaven”.
- That means Judgment Day is actually every day.
- I’ll let you in on another secret related to creating your own experience: Man never left the Garden of Eden. The abundant paradise is still exactly where we reside, but we The Fall of Man happened when we covered it up for ourselves with layers of artificially created scarcity and imaginary limitations. That is what the matrix is. Take the red pill and you are back.
- Reincarnation is obviously real. Life cannot be destroyed, it only changes form. Just like a corpse over time becomes the soil which then gets absorbed by plant until that plant gets eaten by a new human that will eventually turn into a corpse again.
- So that means I’m cheating you all and it doesn’t matter if you shoot me or not because I’m immortal. (MANIACAL LAUGHTER).
- I’m kidding.
- Goodbye world.
- I loved you all.
- My treasure is buried underneath the…
- Choke. Hnnnngggggg
- Kidding again. (I always wanted to do that.) Just give me a second while ninja-swift-kick this assassin in the nuts, high five myself, take his gun and point it at you.
- Your turn baby.
- What would YOU say?
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